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This question is absolutely impossible to answer. Something changed in my brain because I realized the likelihood of that being true. Love yourself, because if you cannot love yourself, why expect anyone else to do it. I personally prefer girls who have a below average weight, and look a little bit bony around the ribs.
I have to take my jeans to the tailor every time i buy new ones just so they could fit. Fat is fat just like height is height but fat can be lost. If she has the desire to change her body because she wants to the change is more likely to stick. Your download will start in. I know a lot of them who are confident and genuinely happy about the way the look. Tall, short, slender, rounder.
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Thanks for helping us sort this video! Select the details below that best describe this video. We appreciate your assistance and will use this information to improve our service to you. All Categories Select all that apply. We finally talked, when he felt like it, and my heart literally hurt for 7 days. What is your thought on this and advice.
I love him and wish to spend my life with him. What is your thoughts on this and advice. What if she had a big booty rather than big breasts. Can she still get away with being a little thick? I mean is the booty to waist ratio just as good as the breast to waist ratio? Magazines and TV will make you crazy obsessing over stuff like breast size and how big your butt is, but the truth is that different guys are attracted to different shapes, sizes, types, etc.
People drive themselves nuts aspiring to look like a certain body type, when really the best body goal to have is whatever healthy and fit looks like for you. The myth of attarctive slim-well toned women…..
But if they ever hv asked their fathers.. Nothing can be done about it. Dont make the mistake that a person will settle for anyone in the end if he is not getting it now…thats the worst thought anyone can ever have…i am an average height, slim boy with average looks …. I love women that are voluptuous, bulky with wide big hips…I am not attracted to slim women biologically.
I love skinny ladies. Long arms and legs, gangly to use a lovely old word. Flat chested with pointy hips and elbows. I have seen genuinely anorexic women in person and they look sick and quite disturbing. Of course this is just my opinion. The real answer is different men prefer different types of women. The only answer should be that men all have their different preferences. This question is absolutely impossible to answer. Preferences are not a crime!
Furthermore, it opens the door wide open for men and women alike to start glorifying one body-type while shaming another. Like being skinny is some sort of disease or something.
My aunt is a prime example. Even I am naturally small. I have never gained past lbs ever and I will be 22 in a few months…I used to eat like a pig to gain weight because people made fun of me for something that was absolutely NATURAL. And whoever said stop with the cardio and exercising and diets…. Eat clean, no matter your size, and exercise! Skinny, big boned, curvy whatever! No matter your size. Furthermore, please stop asking one man what men like! Men have vastly different preferences.
I feel confident that my male associates like this because during guy talk I am not shy about they fact that I prefer a much skinnier girl. Lara Flynn Boyle at her thinnest was perfectly proportioned to my eye. Even in the privacy of the locker room other guys are vehement about reject that. At the same time, however, I know some guys who have admitted getting of to serious Thinspo. So, there is a huge range. Thus I believe guys who say that America Ferrara fits with their ideal, even though that is beyond what I could imagine being anywhere near mine.
I love the blunt and honest article here Eric. The comments from others too! This is like a classroom dicussion without being in a classroom. Thanks Eric for your powerful article! I am a naturally super skinny. People will say to me all the time that I need to eat so that I can gain some weight.
These comments make me very angry, because I actually eat a lot. People need to learn that not all stereotypes are true. We all have other much more important things to worry about than what the perfect size is, there is no perfect size. We all have different body shapes and the number on the scale can be healthy for someone and be overweight or underweight for someone else.
We should worry about our health not the number on the scale. I said to a mate the other day, do you remember when women were thin.. Curvy is like a guy who has no job, and toned is like an ambitious male. Personality is number 1 to a woman.. I thank you for your honesty, because your opinion seems to be shared by the majority of males. I agree that body proportions have alot to do with it, and know many girls who can carry more weight than me and still get plenty of positive feedback from men, but most women look better on the lower end of their healthy BMI unless very large boned.
It was really sad. She would look pretty small and be a size I hardly know any. I do know a lot of overweight people who have bad eating habits — they know what food is healthy and what is not and yet they chug gallons of sodas and sweetened beverages. Women just need to understand the way men think a little more, and look at it from an evolutionary stand point. As an average skinny guy a cyclist, so very fit but little upper body muscle and even less body fat , I think most skinny women are unattractive.
This bothers me about girls too! STOP with all the cardio! STOP with all the starvation! Doing weight lifting or calisthenics does incredibly awesome thing for the female body! In fact, studies are starting to find that heavy running everyday is BAD for the body!
I personally do boxing or kick boxing for my cardio, which is every other day. And another thing is eat whole foods. The closer the food is to its original state, the healthier it is and more calories it takes your body to process it. That means an apple is healthier and burns more calories for the body to digest than apple sauce.
Do a lot more weight lighting, light cardio, and eat more whole foods and your body WILL change. Weight is a number. Go for size and fitness level instead.
Actually muscle does not burn that much more fat than fat does. If you are not naturally skinny you need to do some form of cardio every day, running brisk walking whatever. Olivia Wilde and Megan Fox and not super skinny, they are average. I prefer girls that are very thin.
I used to be a little bit heavier and actually got hit on even more. I am super skinny… always have been… managed to gain few kgs last year and even then I weighed 46 kgs only.. External appearance fades away, while inner beauty last forever. Some men simply prefer skinny women! And I perfectly understand that others prefer ones with more fat. Beauty is in proportions mostly, anyway. Stay strong, be kind and surround yourself with good people.
Neither am I fat. I like how you answered this question. I try my hardest, but its hard sometimes and this article makes me feel a little better about myself and your answer really was a great one to read. It was very well thought out. Ive been told by numerous men thet they prefer curvy girls as long as they are toned eg no canteen lady arms.
I was so thin in high school and i looked like a lolly pop there was no shape unless seen in a bikini. I went to the gym to get help to put on weight in a healthy way and i feel much more like a woman. Everyone has their own idea of what is attractive. I cant stand guys that go to the gym everyday with muscles pumping out in every direction.
Such a turn off for me. I think men were much more attracted to me when I was thinner, even though I think I was way too thin in fact I drank ensure shakes to try and gain back then! I look at pics of myself from back then now and I think I looked like a stick with boobs! Do you see them talking about how they need to gain or lose anything to get women. Maybe back then you appeared more happy. Personally I understand what you are talking about and personally more weight would put myself off.
I think a guy will also b attractive to how u see yourself if u c yourself as a confident lady and you seem happy with yourself then he wnt c many faults either guys like a confident woman. Be happy regardless as there will always b ppl with opinions and will try to put u down regardless of how much u weigh and what u look like.
Keep smiling and show every1 your happy with yourself like I said men love confidence! My bones never grew properly during puberty so I appear skinny. I have not been skinny in years.
As a matter of fact, after my twins, I gained weight that I have not been able to get rid of. I eat right and I exercise and do my very best to be healthy. I still have many men find me attractive and pursue me. I can laugh at my faults, know my quirks, and embrace the complex silly creature that I am.
I laugh a lot and dont sweat the small stuff. You have really touched this subject excellently and honestly. I believe what you said about guys having different tastes because I asked some of my guy friends about it and they said there are different guys with different tastes, some like women who are skinny, some middle-sized women and some overweight women.
I am a volleyball player and I like to keep myself fit and healthy and guys approach me. If he wants a different body size then he go to bounce. Women can be nasty at times with overweight women, and with women that are fit. Your answer is spot on! I use to be inlove with a skinny girl I never want to tell her that she was too skinny cause I was afraid to hurt her feeling I cheated on her many times I would do the same if the woman was fat.
I think different men like different types of women. I am a naturally skinny women who always had no problem with men. I have always wanted to gain weight just because where I come from its ideal to be thicker. Still trying to gain that pounds which we make me more happy but to me be happy with the way you are. Work towards healthy goals. Not all men want the same thing. Do you have any advice for women like me who are just naturally thin?
I do actually have some advice for you and if you wish to contact me directly you may do so by emailing me at ItsMarg hotmail. The first thing you, or anyone, needs to address is why they are the weight they are. Also, how you personally absorb calories and different types of fats is important for you to find out. Methods of finding things like this include visiting an endocronologist, nutritionalist, or even a well experienced personal trainer who specializes in thin people gaining weight vs loosing weight.
No two people have the same ideal diet. I am not in any way an expert, however I have mastered learning my own body, how my motabolism works, what products to use to retain high levels of protein, how many calories I need daily, how to get those calories to stick to me, which fats are good for me, which fats are bad for me, the core foods and amouts of such that I should eat daily and of course the types of exercizing I should be doing.
I have yet to reach my target weight of lbs but I went from being someone who despite eating all day and only weighing in at the mid 80s to currently being a solid, consistant 98lbs. You just have to know your body and how it works. Shoot me an email and we can talk more about how I did it and what I learned about myself.
Maybe that could help. I think that this was well written. If she has the desire to change her body because she wants to the change is more likely to stick. Women come in all shapes and sizes. I personally have never been super skinny. The heaviest I have been is So I have learned a lot about myself throught this journey of body image that has happened in we will say the past 10 years. I have just now come to a place of acceptance of what I would like to be.
Yes men may inspire me to get fit but ultimately I am doing it for me because I want to feel good about myself. Does that mean he is not interested in me any more or is a temporary issue …. We are not communicating anymore since this issue happened.
I think women have it too easy to not bother, or stay plump these days. Stores move the dress sizes up a click to accommodate the masses and make them feel better about themselves when they fit into a smaller size. There are herds more plus size women about now than there used to be too, making it seem more acceptable to be a fatty. The strain on health services is overwhelming with obesity caused Illnesses. The only way this world will not end up eating itself is if there are laws brought in to limit the size a person can be.
I have no love for greed, and thats all it is. A healthy weight is whats acceptable, not fat, not unhealthily thin. You can never change that and it will never change, there will always be simple people. I have no time or respect for fat women, just stop it! You silly people, and the real skinny ill looking ones too, stop it you idiots!
Look normal, just normal is nice, nobody likes an extremist. YOU are an idiot for not considering the women who cannot help but look the way they do because of for example anorexia, thyroid, obesity etcetera. What is wrong with a few rolls? The government is actually doing ssomething right and are not putting a limit to clothe sizes because that is just ridiculous and frankly outrageous.
I feel like a skeletor! I am not trying to be thin, I am just stressed and have a hyperactive metabolism! Is this body-type repulsive to all men? Tara, your boyfriend is ridiculous.
I am exactly the same height and weight as you, and I have found plenty of men who are attracted to me. Also a high metabolism. You might want to reconsider who you are dating. No, you are not repulsive to all men. Some of us love love love skinny girls.
I like a range of female body types but I definitely have a strong preference for thin. Tell him to go find a Kim Kardashian-type girl.
Find a guy who likes skinny girls. You sound so adorable. I find thin girls to be delicate, very feminine and extremely attractive. Love your skinny body!! There are lots of us men who are extremely attracted to skinny girls.
Do pec flyes or bench press to build you bust and hip thrusts to make your butt bigger. Twice a week only.
You can probably find it on Amazon. Eric, not bad…i appreciate how you touched on all points and also reiterated fitness health with a particular emphasis on fat loss vs. Who cares what men like or think? Seriously I am more concerned about trying to find one I like romantically so I can date him. Most guys will bang anything, skinny or fat. Women are the ones who should be picky. Eric Charles, get off your soapbox with this crap.
It sends the wrong message. Actually I think expecting women to cook and clean after a guy does significantly less for sexual equality.
Having an opinion on what is healthy for a woman is not sexist simply because it comes from a guy. This post is a bit old now and probably closed but Im gonna go ahead and contribute anyway. I have to say I think this is not true. That western men like women who are lbs heavier than most women would think or that men like fit, curvy women. I know from my own experience of being several different weights that men like very slim women the best. Certainly Australian men do. I get plenty of male attention but NOTHING compared to what it was like when I was super slim, and I mean model slim not anorexic, but still much leaner that I could normally carry off, even with exercise.
I was quite shocked. I was at this weight due to being depressed and didnt like my body that skinny. I have never been so ogled, yelled at from cars, approached in bars and stared at, called stunning as much as then.
Even my husband liked it better. Western men who say they dont like very slim Im not talking anorexic but model thin women are just lying. Men are conditioned through the current culture to like women who look like models, and that means very slim. We are all lemmings in one way or another and cultural conditioning is a powerful force.
Do you even know how easy it would be to maintain that body fat at that weight at your height? Extremely easy, do you want to know why? Because you had no muscle, in fact you could have almost just as easily lowered your body fat by gaining just a little more muscle.
Those stats you gave put you at a FFMI of You would have got just as much attention, perhaps even more had you been a fat whale because just as many guys are chubby chasers who have a fat fetish. You were not ideal so stop being delusional. You have to move on. Be rational, logical and practical. If he were to take you back, it would be for the wrong reasons and he would just end up more than likely hurting you again.
Good God, I hope you mean 45 kg. There is a noticeable difference. Large and flabby thighs are a huge turn off for me, as is cellulite. I almost totally agree with you man. They just need to be fit and lean. I tried many different approaches but it kept creeping up.
I had become barrel-chested and yet legs remained the same. I was personally uncomfortable with my appearance, but I look younger than my years and knew I was trying. I do prepare fresh, healthy food. In the meantime, my sex life completely dried up with my husband. As crushing as this was which I now know was for completely different reasons , I managed to get down to a size 10 and felt pretty good, more confident.
I then had my gallbladder removed and lost another two sizes- 6. It crept back up when new diet stabilized- size 8. At this point, my confidence was nil and it had nothing to do with my weight.
This weight loss was gradual over a 4-year period. Exercise was sporadic and mostly included brisk walks with the dogs. The constant criticism and lack of intimacy took its toll and after I caught him with another woman, we separated two years ago. Within 2 months of separation, I had lost another 20 lbs.
It was just a smokescreen. I am currently a size 2 for past two years and weigh less than I did when I was in high school at age Clothes are more fun perhaps but what an emotional toll.
And the rapid weight loss has caused my skin to sag in various places, aging me. But I allowed another person to dictate and modify my self-image and lost my confidence and curves in the process. All I can say is: Men love her body and attitude! Wow, this is great, if this is truly how men think then I am happy, very very happy, it is about time woman realize that a little fat is good, I have never been on a diet, but I must say I worried at one stage if my body was not a problem , my husband had a good looking young little girl as a lover, now after this, I will be dressing up more in the dresses and shorts I like , after all who at the age of 42 is perfect and 2 children later is not funny either, anyway thank you for this artical, it is what woman need, well done!
Always did think that skinny is cute.. But after a while I learnt that a good persona goes a long way.. And it also helps a lot if u love yourself.
So good wrk love.. Is healthy to be weighty.. Both physically and emotionally. This is my first visit to your blog! We are a group of volunteers and starting a new project in a community in the same niche.
Your blog provided us useful information to work on. You have done a wonderful job! Women of a wide range of shapes and sizes can be considered attractive, and everyone has different tastes.
It sickens me and I wish that people would stop wasting so much energy on something so irrelevant. I am 18 years old and am friends with a lot of girls who I have observed over the years. One thing I always see is that they spend a great majority of their time looking at pictures of women they perceive as hot and then either wishing that they looked like them, or finding their faults.
None are happy with the way that they look, even though most are gorgeous themselves and have many guys who are attracted to them. Why is everyone so obsessed with numbers? We should not be looking at superficial things like that. Just please, try to love yourself the way you are because nobody likes a moody, depressed woman being happy and smiling is an attractive trait!
If you are overweight or obese, then stop looking for someone to tell you that you are not. You have to accept it and try to change for the better. Make sure you get a chance to live the full life that you deserve. So kudos to you, Eric Charles, for pointing it all out, and I hope your words have made a different to many people, because everything you said is true!
A pound of muscle and a pound of fat both still weigh a pound. Same as a pound of lead and a pound of feathers. A pound is a pound. Muscle is more dense than fat. If you filled a cup with muscle and you filled a cup with fat, the muscle would weigh more…. Yes, a pound of feathers weighs the same as a pound of lead. But the volume is quite different. I figured it was obvious that I was talking in terms of volume and density. I agree that most men like fit women who are proportionate.
AMD also tried to keep in shape by swimming and aerobics. I never could lose enough weight to not be considered fat and I should have been as skinny as a rail. And, I get plenty of attention from men due to my confident, upbeat, honest attitude.
He tells me that my body is just a shell and my real beauty is on the inside and oh shines through, making me extremely attractive. Do I wish to stay obese? But, when I am able I will exercise and lose weight for ME. I have skinny, pretty friends that want to know my secret. I tell them there is no secret. Love yourself, be confident and most important, love men!
Thank you for posting this. Again, great post, thanks. I am about 10 lbs overweight, I think, but he keeps telling me how much he loves my body. I thank you for being so genuine. Generally people stay within their body type.
Fit thin men are with fit thin women and heavier guys are with heavier women. Average is one thing, fat is another. Women naturally store body fat, but in todays environment it can be very easy to eat unhealthy and be immobile. Perhaps i am side tracking just a little but i think the problem is about LOVE and our focus on image as real and as the most important thing.
And attraction in love has nothing to do with what shape your body is. I think in media and socially, we get used to affirming things to each other that arent at all important or helpful. We nod our heads and go yeah yeah just because that is what we feel we are meant to like and say. Say it enough to each other, see it enough and you start to absorb it and believe it. Go to the supermarket, take a look at the loving couples — all shapes and sizes and obviously loved!
A male friend told me when i was a teen, that the most sexy girl he had ever been with didnt have a conventionally shaped body, but because she loved her look and was confident, he loved being with her the most of any girl he had been with.
Thanx for stimulating our thoughts on the subject …. I mean in nature and evolutionary stance men are programmed to prefer women with higher body mass, fuller hips, plumpy thighs and water balloon boobs as a sign of reproductive maturity or whatever … and naturally men do seem to go for them way more. Eric you know how to make any girl feel good about theirselves! I recently ran into this and I was amazed by your thoughts and the time you put into posting this response. Im quite self-concious myself.
Im generally healthy and fit but I work a whole lot I really just feel so insecure around other females. Your article really helped me come to terms with my body though. My boyfriend likes my shape and said that if I had bigger boobs, it would look weird for my frame.
I thought he was just saying that to make me feel better, but your comment about ratios is starting to make me realize that maybe my boyfriend is right. I completely agree with everything in this article. I feel better if I take care of myself. And to be frank, I do it for myself. I want to be healthy. I want to live a long life. I may not appeal to everyone and that has taken some accepting over the years but I appeal to myself.
I think ultimately, we need to love who we are for our own sakes, not just for others. So I am naturally skinny and tiny height. And concerned with my inspirations: I liked Lindsay Lohan as she was in Mean Girls… perfect.
Avril Lavigne never did all that much for me, but she probably has a good body. My ideal girl would look like the hot secretary chick from 30 Rock. That is a devastatingly hot girl… man…. The fat obsession is not based on anything men think or say. We honestly do not care, as long as you do something worthwhile with your time, like using your brain to conclude that your diet and exercise efforts are futile and you should find a real hobby so that your personality has more depth than a few inches of diet and exercise regime.
In fact, its selfish for women to sit around and diet and exercise and emaciate themselves for some illusion that all this futile exercise and dieting will make them more attractive to the men in their lives. Learn to shoot guns, find out what philosophy you subscribe to, study something that has consequence in your life, and get some exercise.
And please, eat whatever the HELL you want. You want to know what worthwhile men think is sexy? How much money can you avoid spending on unnecessary skinny-fat-celebrity-talk bull shit? You think dieting will completely absorb her personality or something? Given a choice between TWO women: MY preference is for D or smaller. I like curvy women, not fat, but hourglass women that care about diets etc but they are more healthy than the super skinny, always watch calories women and also the curvy hourglass type women tend to have much better attitudes when it comes to dating.
I actually think this article is very diplomatic and honest. Yes, most men like women that are curvy but rather petite. I eat the same stuff as other people that are healthy — lots of vegetables, no fat meat,dark bread, oat flakes for breakfast and only water or tea for drinks. No fast food or alcohol except for the odd evening out.
But what I do to keep my body relatively healthy is I do a lot of cycling and walking — not jogging, just walking in the woods and sometimes some power-walks. In the summer I like beach volleyball and badminton. That makes me feel good. Thank you for writing these inspiring articles, Eric, some have really been changing my way of thinking about things! People whoare skinny want to be curvier, people who are curvy want to be skinner, people with big boobs want smaller ones, people who are tall wanna be shorter.
The thing that kind of worried me though is that fat can be lost, but body shape cannot, u will always have the body shape u were born with whether u are small or big. Hahaha oh man, this post really got quite the response from the crazies. A must visit place for singles. Join an casual interest group. You can meet casual swingers. Find a hot gay date. Meet sexy single lesbians. Top rated sex personals. Below is a list of our most popular cities in the United States.
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And there would be wide variation in which healthy body people find most attractive. My opinion is and always has been, that health starts with a persons mind and self confidence so if you love someone, and think they should make better choices for themselves it is best to get that point across without stomping on their self-esteem. Well then lose the weight.
To a lot of men we classify those stick figure women as anorexic and just not that appealing.
So large meals spaced far apart! When I was 16, I was tall, awkward and super skinny. I am constantly on a rollercoaster of loosing weight, gaining weight, loosing weight, gaining weight, and it is big girl dating skinny guy i loose track of the ultimate reason i should be making life changes. I kind gurl big girl dating skinny guy offence for us naturally skinny girls. It means there will be more super slim girls for the rest of us: Luckily I didnt buy into it and now I weigh a little more and men think Im sexy so Im happy with that.
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